Shaky Hands

Life is about perspective. Sometimes it’s how we look at a situation that will determine if we benefit from it or fail.

When I was scheduled to receive my transplant, Dr. Vella started me on immunosuppressant drugs a few weeks out. This was done by giving me a dose of pills twice per day, knowing I would take these pills for the rest of my life. A few days into taking the pills, I noticed my hands began to shake. The shake became more prominent as it was difficult for me to hold utensils or write my name. It got so bad that I dropped two antique pieces and was ashamed to greet people. The shake was uncontrollable and seemed to be noticed by everyone. The following week I saw Dr Vella and he asked me to hold out my hands. I couldn’t wait to show him my problem for I knew something was wrong. This was not normal and I felt I could not go through life as such. After holding out my shaking hands he said; “Good.” “What could be good about this?!” I began my spat of how this could not possibly be a good thing. He then said; “I want you to shake so much that you vibrate across the floor.” He then explained he needed to drop my immune system to accept the new kidney. That, if my immune system was not suppressed, my bodies immune system would attack and kill the new kidney which would possibly lead to my demise . He said, the best sign of my immune system lowering would be shaking of the hands………
The next morning when I woke, I looked at my shaking hands and again found myself upset as to what I was experiencing. However, this time I was worried my hands were not shaking enough. I felt I needed my hands to shake more so my immune system would not destroy my to be transplanted kidney. In one night I changed my perspective.

Many times in life we go through situations. These can seem difficult at times. For example:

I have been training, but I am not losing weight.
However, have you given 100 percent and consistent?
I work so hard and my boss does not notice me.
Have you worked hard or just doing your job?
I studied so much but, It didn’t show.
Did you study or look over notes the night before?
It’s Monday. I don’t want to go to work.
What if you were on your sick bed. Would you rather be in a hospital bed or on the job?
I have a cold, and I feel so miserable.
Are you going to die?
I’m on dialysis! I feel miserable!
Are you thankful there is a machine to keep me alive?